Positive Things!

 September 27, 2011
#1 I got a C+ on my Abnormal Psychology Exam and I feel good because to me, that is my A :)
#2 I sat down to write small notes to all of the members of NDA, because I did it NOW!
#3 I found the most amazing quote as I was reading "Happier" and it was exactly what I needed to hear! "Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?

September 26, 2011
#1 I feel like I got a lot accomplished today, it makes me feel good :)
#2 I went into the lab with Sarah today to look at some pretty neat stuff
#3 I had an amazing rehearsal of Nordost, it is going to be a great show!

September 25, 2011
#1 I got to sleep in again :)
#2 I went to worship service with Sarah and I had a really nice time, I feel God's presence there. He is the random cold chills I feel when He is there :)
#3 I was able to go the IA session and now I feel better about my Lab Practical on Thursday :)

September 24, 2011
#1 I was finally able to get some sleep, relax and be lazy for a change, after studying all week :)
#2 I was able to go to Philadelphia with Carly and Sarah, we had so much fun at Lucky Strikes, free food and bowling, all for free! :)
#3 I sang with Sarah a lot of fun songs like Hairspray, Elvis Presley and Grease! She has Great Music!
#4 I was also able to go to study for Positive Psychology, but more importantly I was there to talk to a really wonderful friend who has grown so much, Courtney :)

September 23, 2011
#1 It's Friday!!!
#2 Laughed before I took my Anatomy and Phsyiology Exam and laughed after I took it as well :)
#3 Went to go see a wonderful dance performance called "Kegwin and Company", they were quite phenomal and I would love to see them again!

September 22, 2011
Hannah
#1 I woke up feeling like I got good quality sleep
#2 I spend 5 days a week with Sarah Jones studying for A&P and she makes me laugh so much! Love that her! With these quotes she shared with me today:

"If you're not going to snort why EVEN laugh."

"If I have to pull up my Big Girl Panties one more time, the elastic will break and will show my ---"
#3 I am very thankful that I get a chance to talk to Luke
#4 I wore my "Wings of Hope" shirt and also receied a letter from my Grammy Smith, I love her Lord :)

Luke
#1 Took a sweet ride in a Mustang GT :)
#2 Cleaned the front entranceway for his Momma G :)
#3 Luke got to talk to me :)

September 21, 2011

Hannah
#1 I had my positive psychology class, which I absolutely love. It is one of the most of the beautiful classes I've ever take :)
#2 First Nordost Rehearsal and it is going to be a FANTASTIC CAST!
#3 I did 30 push-ups :)

Luke
#1 He didn't take a lunch break and got off at 5 and still got in 10 hours
#2 He is alive!
#3 At a pepperoni roll or lunch :)

Wedding Rings...

Alright, so you are probably wondering why I have that as a title. It is not because I keep on having constant thoughts of my wedding next summer (which is only half of it). It is because I learned something new about John and Korey Cooper. Ok, so who are they? They are two of the members of the band Skillet who are married.

They are a pretty amazing band, but besides that. I learned a FUN FACT about Korey and John Cooper. I learned that they both have tattooed wedding rings! Isn't that nifty? I thought it was anyways, I am not a big fan of tattoos but I think I would definitely consider getting a tattooed wedding ring. It would definitely be on there for life, but I just thought it was nifty...

This is John Cooper and if you look closely you can see his tattoed wedding ring...

April Dress #24--#30

The Story: So this is my last dress for the month of April, but save the best for last! This dress was an absolute steal of a find! I went to a thrift store for halloween in need of trying to find an outfit and of course I find this! It is so unique that I can't even turn it down and decided to get it for my first halloween costume, like ever! I ended up winning a prize for it at a Cedar Crest Halloween Dance Party, I think it was most unique or something like that. This dress is ridiculously wonderful (even though the slit is yay long) It is one of my favorites :) So, that's all folks! Until April of 2012 to do it all again!

April Dress #30

The Story: Guess where it's from? Yup, that's right, Forever 21 (I wasn't lying when I told you it's one of my favorite stores!) I had my Aunt Ally in Virginia Beach buy me this dress, because my Grandma bought me a dress, she bought me a dress and I bought a skirt. I thought it was a pretty good deal :) I love this dress, it's definitely a more classy looking dress. I believe I went to go to Jilly's art show in this dress. I love dressing up for art shows too, I just love dressing up in general :)

April Dress #29

The Story: Ha ha oh man! Watch out people, you don't want me near a motorcycle! Well, sometimes I go through these phases where I see it and I really want it. Again, another Forever 21 dress. I bought for really cheap, I think like $7, but that wasn't even the best part! My mother helped me pick out, as much as I love my mom I never thought she would help me pick out a dress like this! But she did, I love my mom and she never ceases to amaze me :)

April Dress #28

The Story: I absolutely adore this dress, even though sometimes it makes me feel like a fish because it has flowy things in the front and the back. So, even though I feel like I have gills sometimes, it is still a wonderful dress. I found it in some store that I had never heard of when I went to the mall with Gracie over Easter Weekend, when I went home with her. They had all kinds of fun, interesting and unique dresses, as well as clothes. I definitely remember that the store sectioned off into colors, so there were pinks and purples, blues and greens, yellows, oranges etc. It was a fun find and I found this dress and wore it on my 20th birthday :)

April Dress #27

The Story: Alrightie, this dress was also bought at Forever 21 as well. It was on clearance and the funny thing was that my room mate and I at the time went to go shopping on the same day and low and behold we both picked out the same dress to buy. I ended up buying another dress just like it, except that it was blue with white pola dots at the top instead of stripes. But I still enjoy that we have the same dress :)

April Dress #26

Now I am playing catch up on all the dresses I missed in posting about them. Anyways, The Story: I am pretty sure this is a thrift store dress, I remember seeing a slim fitting solid tube top dress on a celebrity. So, naturally being a girl I wanted to get one for myself. Since I am tiny it still flares out a little bit, but the best part with thise dress is that I can add or do pretty much anything I want to it :) That's the beauty of the simplicity of dresses sometimes :)

April Dress #25

The Story: Can you guess where I bought this dress from? Only my favorite store in the world! Anyways, I went to Atlanta, GA during my junior year in high school for marching band. One of my friends let me borrow one of her asian looking dresses, similar to this one, but the one she let me borrow was patterned. She told me she bought it from Forever 21 and so I loved the dress so much that I REALLLY wanted one just like the one she let me borrow. Well, they ended up not having it, sad face :( so I bought this one instead and I really like it a lot! It is long on me because I am a little vertically challenged, but thats okay because it feels nice on my skin and it's a quick dress you can throw on and anyone looks good in it :)

Dress # 24

Atlanta, GA Dress

April Dress #23

Side Note: I am FINALLY caught up on my blog, be proud :) Only got 7 more days of dresses to go!

The Story: I found this dress in a thrift store, if you haven't noticed the theme of either Forever 21 and/or thrift stores. That's how I roll! Anyways, it reminded me of something that would come out of Charlotte Russe because they usually have the uniqe floral patterns, but it's not from there. I actually don't know where it originally came from anyways, I just know that I really love it and that I saw a similar dress in a magazine that had the same cut dress and it looked fabulous with an under shirt and brown dress, but I spice it up my own way with my peacock headband, jean jacket and cute floral shoes :)

April Dress #22

The Story: YES! Another dress from Forever 21! Ha ha I told you that was my favorite dress store! Anyways, I adore the simplicity of this one because I can add anything to it. It unfortunately has a long slit from behind, so I have to wear leggings or I was wearing shorts underneath this one :) I am also borrowing my mommies whale-of-a-tale rain boots that I absolutely think are adorable! Although I don't think of whale-of-a-tale, I think of Moby Dick! Moby Dick the Musical!

April Dress #21

The Story: Hee Hee another Forever 21 dress, this dress is actually a size Large, but I LOVE it! It leaves room so I can dance and move around in, but if someone else wants to borrow it then they can :) This dress was like $7 at Forever 21, I instantly fell in love because of its unique patterns and artsyness about it! My friend Grace recently showed me that if I turn it inside out that it has a different look, so now it's my only reversible dress :) Anyways, it's fabulous and I right now I am going to say that I looked gorgeous that day in that dress, everything was working quite alright :)

April Dress #20

The Story: My favorite person in the world Dawn gave me this dress and I LOVE it! It fits so perfectly on my body and it's super comfy! Dawn is my boyfriend Luke's mother and she is like a mother to me, that's why I call her Momma G. I love Momma G so much! She and I could talk about anything in the world! She has given me so much and I feel ridiculous sometimes because I don't have anything to give her back except, the love for her son and her family! I am so blessed to have known Dawn and her family for awhile, I love that family so much and I pray I get to have an amazing family like Dawn's :) Love You Momma G!

April Dress #19

The Story: I found this dress in a thrift store, I fell in love with it because it matched perfectly with a pair of American Eagle Ballet Flats that I owned, I am not wearing them in the picture. I am wearing the rain boots my Best Friend from home Avalon gave me! Their awesome! I just had to laugh because she bought me rain boots because I had borrowed hers for a while semester or maybe two semesters! Anyways on the front of the box it said "Das Boot" and for that just google it and then you will understand why I was laughing so hard because what I found in the boots totally made my day :) Also, there was a ballet charm in it as well and I love it soo much, I was putting it on my phone, but it ended up breaking, so I put it in its box and now it looks pretty, but I am sad :( Anyways, don't tell me that opening an Umbrella is bad luck because I do not believe in luck, I am blessed :)

April Dress #18

The Story: My sister had this dress and I really like it a lot, it fit me very perfectly. The length and everything! Anways, she told me that I could have it and so I kept it. I haven't worn it out very much, but I did wear it for a wedding, my friend Crystal Buxton-Carter got married while I was home for Spring Break. I went with my mother to the ceremony and then Luke came to the reception with me. It was the first time I had anyone come to a wedding with me, besides my family. It was really nice and refreshing, I pray that Luke gets to come to all the weddings that I get to go to, he is the best date ever :)

April Dress #17

The story: I definitely bought this dress at a thrift store and I love it! I wore this dress for prom with my friend Kyle Bowman, during my senior year in high school I had promised him since I didn't have a date my senior year and I was rockin it out by being single that I would be his date to his senior prom. I told Luke at the time about this and I told Luke that I promised and he was totally fine with it....well kinda...Kyle is one of his good friends now, but Luke totally crashed that prom. Yes, he got escorted across the middle of the dance floor and out the door, if I remember correctly. Apparantly I missed it though and was oblivious to the whole thing! I do love this dress a lot though!

April Dress #16

The Story: Alrightie, well my brother and my sister-in-law bought me this dress from Hollister and I LOVE it! More than anything I was just really happy to see him and his wife Ashley :) Totally made my day! I wore it just for him, since he bought it for me! It was kind of a crappy day, it rained all day and so we were all sort of cranky and then we all went to Perkins for like a late brunch/dinner and it was very delicious! We went to the mall and we all looked around at the lovely Lehigh Valley Mall, then they came to see the show that night and my brother wore his uniform just for me :) Like I said I was soooo blessed to see him and his wife, that was the BEST 21st gift I could ever get. Thank You Lord for allowing our whole family to be together :)

April Dress #15

The Story: I bought this dress the day before my 21st Birthday! It was my birthday present to myself and my friend Jill helped me pick the dress and fabulous shoes! I had a day outfit with my dress and an evening outfit for it as well! The cool part is that I bought it from Forever 21! My boyfriend told me I HAVE to buy it from Forever 21, he is so prec :) Anyways, I had a really good day that day, every where I went I was treated like a Princess, since I don't get to be treated like a Princess every day because I don't want to be treated like a Princess every day, but just one day :) I got free food ALL day :) Everywhere I went so people complimented me on my dress, it was just really nice :) My friend Grace bought me some surprises the night before and we waited until midnightm, then I went to bed :P I also went out with my friends after opening night of the Student Dance Works show and we went to Applebee's we had a lot of fun, but I believe every one got more fun out of me being silly. I didn't wake up the next morning with a headache and I remember that night :) But the best birthday present comes on April Dress #16 :)

Fun Fact About Tiara: I waited a whole year to open this up, because my dance buddy last year saw that I had a tiara with gloves and a wand. So she got me one for my 21st birthday and I waited a whole year to open it up :)

Day Dress (Rockin it with my friend Monica's Converses!)



Evening Wear (Lookin Fab with my friend Kim an my stellar heels)

April Dress #14

The Story: This dress is again from my all time favorite clothing store! FOREVER 21! It was on sale for around $10 or $12 and it was a fantastic find! I found another dress identical, which you will probably see in a few more days :) I went shopping with one of my awesome friend's for this dress. I usually wear bright yellow shoes with it, but I wore green shoes with it :) Anyways, today was good! The sun was shining! The Lord gave us all a pretty day today! I soaked up the sun and ate free Rita's! It was a marvelous day!!

April Dress #13

The Story: I went shopping my freshman year of college with my friends Carly, Jill and Kaitlin and we went to Walmart to shop and we found these cute matching dresses! They were all $5 and we all got them in different colors and of course I had to get Cedar Crest colors, but I love this dress because it has pockets! Unfortunately, it is getting a little a small on me, but that's okay I will give it to someone who can make good use of it :)

April Dress #12

The Story: First of all, this dress super duper comfy and I totally dig that, especially like a day today in Allentown when it's all rainy and you want comfy warm things :) Anyways, this dress...I honestly don't remember where I got it, but I believe it was a hand-me-doan dress, which means it was free! I am all for the free stuff, because you never know what you can find! So this dress doesn't have much of a story, except that I went clubbing in this dress once and it was the comfiest dress I had ever worn out to go clubbing. Every one tells me it looks like a night gown, oh well it's comfy :)

April Dress #11

The Story: It's been awhile when I got this dress, I do not remember which thrift store I got it at. I remember being like "this is the perfect fit", which totaly is. There is wire in the bust area, which is similar to a corset to give it some shape/figure for the body and I love it. I remember it was fairly cheap, around $7 and I always tried to imagine who had this gorgeous dress before me...anyways, I always think of my one friend Yael. She is quite gorgeous and I always thought that this would be something that she wears because she always and still does have amazing outfits that are floral deigned like this one. This dress makes me that girlie so much, she is an amazingly gorgeous friend and I will never forget that when we both auditioned for both Modern companies, that she came up to me and told me that she loved my hair, because I was the only one who had curly hair like her :)

April Dress #10

The Story: I bought this dress in a store called Gabriel Brothers, it's a clothing store where there are brands such as American Eagle, Hollister, Angel, Calvin Klein, Paris Blues and so on and so forth. Well these are apparel that come from those stores when the stores aren't able to sell them or most of the time they are considered defective. So you can get a a good pair of jeans from $5 to $20 and it's nice! Well I was looking on the rack and I found this one and I thought it was super cute, the straps were really long on me so I sewed them, but this is probably one of the comfiest dresses I have ever owned. It looks super cute in the winter time with leggings, boots and a cute knitted hat :)

April Dress #9

The Story: This dress was bought from forever 21, if you haven't noticed that I am quite fond of that clothing store and I have a few more dresses from there. This dress was bought for me from my grandmother, her and my aunt bought me a dress that I wanted in the same store. I love this dress so much! I wear it so much when it's nice out, but I thank my grandmother and think of her every time that I wear it. I love my grandmother very much, she has helped me so much and she is just so wonderful! I can't imagine my life without her. Also, the reason why I am a little smaller in this picture is because my friend Grace took the beautiful scenery behind me of how much of a gorgeous day it was to wear a dress! It has been raining all week in Allentown and now we had some sunshine! Couldn't let it go to waste :)

April Dress #8

The Story: This is a simple brown dress and I was outting it on today, I picked out some black to go along with it and the whole time I was doing this I was thinking of my friend Grace and Andrea who do not like the colors of black and brown, because they don't go together. But i got their approval in thinking that this was good because it is a lighter color brown as opposed to a dark chocolate and black :) I have had this dress for quite sometime and I believe I bought it with another dress at a forever 21, which is absolutely one of my favorite clothing stores, it's another simple dress, but that's why I like it :)

April Dress #7

The Story: So, this dress doesn't have much of a story either, but it's simple and fantastic :) I got many compliments today on it, I usually don't wear a lot of pink, but I think it's a good color on me. It's a simple dress, but simplicity is my thing sometimes. Well my friend Grace and I went to go have fun in a thrift store, since I absolutely love thrift stores and they are the best because you can find the coolest things there because they are so unique! Well, Grace and I were trying on dresses and I instantly fell in love with this dress, the simplicity of it is amazing :) So, Grace took a pic of it for me tonight (apparently I look like Mila Kunis) and the Senior Dance Concert was tonight. I will miss my senior dancers very much, I love you all so much my girlies!

April Dress #6

The Story: This dress doesn't have too much of a story, just a little one though :) I have had this dress since I was in middle school and yes I can still wear it and yes I know you're probably jealous. I found this dress when I had some clothes give to me, there was actually a similar dress like this, but somehow it got ruined, thrown away, mainly it has never been seen again. This dress is pretty short on me, I believe it's meant for little girls, but oh well I still make it work, the leggings help a lot :) It was half rainy today, so I wanted to get a picture of it with my fabulous shoes, before I had to walk out with boots on :)

April Dress #5

The Story: This dress is a very old dress, but has so much sentimental value to it, because it belonged to my Aunt Ann who passed away when I was wee one :) I didn't know her at all, I don't remember being around her, hearing her voice or anything. I just know what my parents had told me and I saw pictures of her as well, but the only thing I felt connected with her was our names. The name Ann is in my name Hannah and that was the only connection I felt that I had with her.

My Uncle Bob was getting rid of her clothes the one day and I remember looking through it all, I remember seeing an satin blue robe with a little bit of lace intwined with it and this dress. I took both items, but I absolutely was so drawn in by this dress, the simplicity of it is what makes it stand out to me. Every time I wear I think of my Aunt Ann, you will forever be imprinted in my heart with this dress Aunt Ann :)

April Dress #4

Here is my fourth dress for today. Although it was a little muggy and icky today, I still wore my dress today.

A Story: This dress was given to me by a very best friend of mine, Carissa. She was the first person I believed I cried my eyes out to at Cedar Crest College. I had some major things going on in my life with my family and whatnot. I remember her taking me for a walk because I wouldn't stop crying and I am sure it was/still is painful to watch me cry. We walked around Cedar Brook park and shared so many things with each other and from then on we have been close. Maybe notso close this year with it being her last year and all, plus she is engaged to a fantastic man. Which I am totally cool with, because whether she knows it or not she has left on imprint on my heart :)

Anyways, I just felt like sharing that story, but she gave me the dress because she was so up and down on whether she should keep it or not becuase it was getting small on her. So she finally gave it to me, and I love it, because every time I put it on I say "Carissa gave me this dress" and I smile :) I love you Carissa Moore, you have helped me to grow so much as an indivual and for that I thank you :)

God's Calling Versus Career.

Today at worship service we talked about the above subject of this blog :) Basically "Where is God calling me to serve?"

To break it down I thought that writing what we learned today might give a better idea of where this is going...

"Can you hear me now?"

1 Samuel 3:1-10

1. Calling vs. Career

A career is something I choose for myself, a calling is something I do for God.

A career may end with retirement, but a calling isn't over until you die.

A career promises wealth, security, power, and status, a calling often involves sacrifice and fear.

2. Discerning the call

Begin by assessing your gifts and abilities.

Consider you heart and your personality.

Examine your experiences and extract the lessons you have learned.

3. A life mission statement

Write out a statement that summarizes God's mission for your life.

Determine a strategy needed in order to carry out God's mission for your life.

Define what "success" means for you regarding your mission.

My Reflections/Thoughts from this...

*Never too old for our calling :)

*Psychology - Men usually die after retirement - if they listen to their calling will they die since they are continuing to have a "purpose" in life?

*Consider your heart...where is that we get excited/passion in life?

*"Changing lives and working in the ministry"

*"Need to have Passion and Zeal"

This all comes down to where does God want me headed in life?



April Dress #3

Today was the last day of our Spring Dance concert and so it felt a little rough today, but the people who are usually like "that was aweful" was like "we got through it" which made me smile a lot, because they aren't focusing on the negative :)

Anyways, this is dress #3 and so story time! I bought this dress when I was 16 and I have had it ever since, I bought specifically for a double date with this guy named Chris, in high school. We went on a double date on his birthday with his parents and it was so pleasant, not to mention romantic as well.

I got all dressed up and Chris had no idea where we were going for his birthday, at least I don't remember if he did or not. Well, we arrived to this french restaurant, to which I had never had french food or ever set foot into this restaurant. It is called the "Au Petit Paris" and it was so elegant, the food was scrumptous and we all had so much fun with our conversations! The  simplicity of the dress is what I love and some people think it is a skirt and dress, but I guarantee that it is a dress :)

April Dress #2

I wore this dress on April 2nd no worries I know my blog says the 3rd of April, but I tried to upload it in time. My parents were over and so I have been catching up with them, so I got distracted and almost forgot, but not really.

Fun Fact: I bought this dress in a thrift store for about $10 and a month later I realized (while facebook creeping) that it is a very common bridesmaid dress, I saw the color in pink, purple and blue. Yes, it made me smile :)

One More Fun Fact: I bought this dress in the summer 2010 because I wanted to take Lucas Geasey out on a date and so I bought the dress a head of time to take him out, so I took him out on a date and he loved/still loves this dress and...I love him :)

April Dress #1

Okay, so I started this thing last year and I am doing it this year and every year that I get a chance!

I have so many dresses and skirts that I thought it would be a waste to not wear them all!

I have over 50 dresses and skirts, what better way to wear them all then for a whole month :)

Here is my first dress of the month of April...

...feeling a little vintage today :)

Life = Not Over

Alright, after a rough month of March and not being able to blog about it too much because of stress etc. AKA welcome to my life :)

My life is not over, I am done being dramatic about it. I cried so much in the month of March I could have probably made a river because of all of my tears...

Truth is I feel better, but now it is me choosing whether or not I should keep my double major or not, which will be decided next week in a couple meetings, so we shall see and I will continue to pray...

The Lord has been showing me so many exciting new things and I have been holding on to Him for dear life in the month of march, will it happen again? Maybe, but I am getting better at trusting the Lord, because I can't do everything by myself, I need to know myself, I need people and most importantly I need God...

God is the only one who knows my fortune...

Fail.

Alright, so I know I haven't written in awhile but I have just been so darn busy and right now my head is about ready to explode unfortunately...

So, the title of this is Fail. It is this way because this week I had 3 exams and I had to get the strength and stamina every day for all three exams and all three days, including today. I was so excited that today would be my last day of exams, but I am sitting here crying. I feel aweful and such a failure at so many things right now.

I realize I am blowing things out of proportion right now, but right now I just need to vent and get it out in the open somewhere. This way if anyone is reading this, they can stop as opposed to my fear of being rejected from them. Anyways, I am a hot mess.

I just can't seem to get motivated to study for anything unless someone is with me, but I don't want to ask for help because that makes me feel stupid and like I am annoying other people. There are two specific classes that I need for both of my majors and right now I am failing both of them....the nice thing about only reading this blog is that you can't tell that I am painfully crying right now...anyways, I do not know what to do, I do not want to stay for an extra semester or two. I want to graduate in May 2012....so what do I do? I need psychology as my major and that is the major I am doing the worst in, but I love dance too much to put it as a minor...I have more of a chance passing for my dance major than psychology.

What if I fail both? Do I just undeclare and put both down for a minor? What I would do with that in life? I would have two minors with excessive credits that could make it a major, but that means what would I get my B.A. degree in? Like nothing! Fantastic! I suck at my life right now, I really want to blame my family for all of this because my family feels so dysfunctional and I can't help but worry about them. Ever since my secomd semester freshman year my GPA has been crap...

But I can't blame my family or myself for caring too much, it's just how I am. I can only blame myself, it is truly and utterly my fault, I thought I could do it and I guess I can't. I don't why I thought I could do it, but I can't....I simply can't...

Lord,
please hear me, I know you can't give us anything we can't handle, but I can't this....I can't, it's too much. Please take it away...please? I am tired Lord, I am so tired...exhausted....drained...I have never felt so exhausted and such like a failure in my life. Please....please....please....please Lord...please...

Crabby.

Ok, so I am feeling a little crabby today. I think it is because I have been doing so much and it feels like I am accomplishing nothing. I wanted to walk out in the sunshine but it went away when I walked outside. My laptop is deciding to fall apart. I am blowing things out of proportion with all my conversations with people and conjoured ideas in my head. I am human what can I say, so here is a picture to express my crabbiness...

HA HA! Okay maybe this picture doesn't quite define how I am feeling, but it is a pretty cute picture.

Alright, sorry for my little freak out. Sometimes I need it, it doesn't happen very often, but I just needed to vent a little bit to get things out instead of bottling them up...I am slowly working on it.

Okay, breathe and say a prayer:

Dear Lord,

I have so many things going on in my life right now that it is so hard to sort them out, I knew Spring Break was supposed to be busy, but I didn't think it would be this busy and crazy. I am just so tired of this semester, I am tired of feeling like I fail at everything. My dance piece is going to ACDFA, but it is only in the informal showing, but I am so scared for people's reactions to it, that they will hate it and just tell me that I suck at everything I do.

I know it's not true, but today it feels like everything is crashing, maybe I did need to go home over break, to breathe in some mountain air and spend time with my family. I do not know what it is, but I am pretty sure it is a combination of everything. Lord, I don't want you to feel sorry for me, I just want you to love me and help guide me through everything that you bring before me. I just feel like a horrible person to others sometimes and I probably am to them, but I do try dear Lord. I really do try and the only one I really need to try for is You dear Lord :)

Thank you for listening to my prayer dear Lord, I love you so much and I know you can bring peace to my heart :)

I Love You Lord



So Much To Do...So Little Time

Alright so, I have a lot to accomplish over Spring Break and since I have been creating blogs and events on facebook to help raise support for my missions trip to Salerno Italy, that has consumed up much of my day and so I have to take a break from it because I am still not finished with it but I need a break and a list...

Sunday, March 6th

TO-DO...

-Shower
-Clean Room
-Finish writing support letters
-Extra-Curriculars
      APO
      NDA
      Class of 2012
      Dance Company
      S.A.
      BSLS
      CCCF
      RA

I think that is all for today, I will make a list for tomorrow :) Help me get everything done today that I need to Lord, thank you.

I am Just a Man.

I met the sweetest old man who told me one of his stories...

I volunteer at a nursing home a couple hours a week and as I was pushing this gentleman back to his room he started pointing to pictures on the wall and asked me where or what I knew it was and I had no idea. So he asked if I had a minute and I told him that I had 5 minutes and he said that was plenty.

He started telling me about the one picture with General Tibbets and that he was friends with this man and served with him. The one thing that General Tibbets is known for is that he was the first pilot to drop the atomic bomb on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. I did remember this because I had taken a course not too long ago about China and Japan, we learned about General Tibbets briefly but I read about him because I did a paper on him awhile ago.

Well this resident had told me that he was the announcer for when Tibbets was going to drop the atomic bomb...

It's really interesting how the mind works and how much of an impact an event has on people? The whole time the resident was telling me this story he was crying and it was just making my heart melt watching him cry and almost reliving that memory again.

He kept telling me that as he was reliving the memory of when he had to speak, that the one thing he remembers distinctly saying is, "I am just a man" and when he said that I thought of everyone and how we are all humans, we are all the same. It doesn't matter how much materialistic things that one may have or that their reputation is a governor, congressman, celebrity, famous dancer, movie star...it doesn't matter because we are human and we are all the same...

I Would Like To Watch...

Something Borrowed - Total chick flick movie, but I dig it :)

Drie

Monday, February 14th

3 Good Things

#1 Valentines Day - A celebration for extra lovin on all the people that I love the mostest!

#2 Another Gorgeous Day  - I am thanking God for all the spectacular gorgeous days that God has been giving us!

#3 BFF - What better way to spend Valentines Day than with your BFF, right now she is sleeping and she looks so pleasant while she is sleeping :)

I am now finished my 3 good things for a week!
It was very delightful and I would love to be able to do it again,
It helps me think even more positive :)

Thank You Lord <3

Kolme

Sunday, February 13th

3 Good Things

#1 Worship Service Was Awesome - I was able to get a ride to worship service and it was amazing, we talked about love since tomorrow is Valentines Day and we talked about War, but all our songs that we sang we about God and His love for Us, it was so amazing! I <3 You Lord!

#2 My BFF - My friend Courtney and I went to Chambersburg, PA to go pick up my best friend from home, she will be staying with me all week, because I promised that she will be my winter formal date for this Saturday, I am so excited for it! I am so blessed to have a BFF like her, she is FAB!

#3 Gorgeous Day for My Aviators - Self-explanatory :)

Trei

Saturday, February 12th

3 Good Things

#1 - Passport - I was able to get some more info on my passport stuff and realized that I can use cash to pay for it because I am all out of checks, which I also successfully ordered!

#2 - Valentines Party - I was able to make myself escape from my room and go have some fun and enjoy simple things in life :)

#3 - Talking to Luke - We have texted the past few days and tonight was the night I was able to actually talk to him, it was nice because I have been dealing with a lot of internal struggling with myself and it was nice to hear his voice and tell me that God has everything under control :)

Drei

Friday, February 11th

3 Good Things

#1 2nd TB Test - One of my friend's was so gracious enough to again take me to Phoebe to get my 2nd TB test and now I can start volunteering there!!! YAY!

#2 Assistant Dance Company Manager, You are Awesome! - I wasn't able to get stuff done in the office today as I would have liked, so my Assistant helped me out a lot and I thank her for that, she helped lift some stress off my shoulders :)

#3 Relax - I was able to just relax on this night because I do not know when I am going to be able to take time for myself and so I got caught up on all my shows and then Gracie joined me and it was so pleasant :)

Tres

Thursday, February 10th

3 Good Things

#1 I am off book by Five by Tenn for one, one act - I kept looking over the lines while the other women were reading their parts and it's still rocky, but I am pretty sure that I got most of it :)

#2 Paperwork is signed for my Ethical Life - I was able to ask one of my friend's to take me to Phoebe and get my paperwork signed :)

#3 Andrea Time!-Almost every Thursday I am going to be spending time with Andrea, because we don't live in the same building anymore, but we find a way to make things work :)

Tre

Wednesday, February 9th

3 Good Things

#1 I got my homework finished before class - I made time today to finish my homework for my kinesiology class :)

#2 I ate all day - I made sure no matter how busy I was to go and get something to eat and I ate breakfast, lunch and dinner with some snacks in between :)

#3 I survived my day - After having an extremely busy/long wednesday I made through it, with all my stamina that the Lord was able to help give me energy for my day, thank you Lord :)

Trois

Tuesday, February 8th

3 Good Things

#1 - I got one of my dance costumes for my SDW piece - someone must have been very ontop of their game in sending it so quickly to me, so thank you :)

#2 - I had four people instead of 2 people at my bible study - I think it helped that I sent out an e-mail that morning of letting everyone know what is happening this week in the CCCF, thank you Lord :)

#3 - One person came to my program - I advertised the day of and the message got out to one person, in which we were able to bond, so I was very tickled because we got to write letters to my brother and his buddies :)

3 Good Things

I returned from my RA staff meeting and my Hall Director explained that she is taking positive psychology. She will continue to interpret everything that she learns in class and apply it to our RA meetings, in which I am super stoked about!

Anyways, it was explained to try an exercise where we have to write 3 good things after dinner and before bed. Then evaulate each one and come up with an idea as to how it started such as ex: My cousin is going to have a baby - I know that God will help see her through on this one

So, I am pretty excited to try it and lower my negative thoughts and build my positive thoughts because it applies to every one, it doesn't matter how rich or wealthy you are. Everyone needs it and everyone makes a choice :)

#1 I got my packet with info to start my trip to Salerno, Italy! - God has really shown me a lot and He will continue to work through me with helping me with all my financial things, such as Fundraising for this trip, because He is awesome like that :)

#2 I got Senior Project Ideas - I met with a wonderful Psychology Professor and he gave me some suggestions of how I can approach my Senior Project since I want to incorporate the brain :)

#3 My brother wrote on my Facebook Wall - I haven't talked to him in months and I get to see him around my birthday, I am praying that everything goes well and that I will be able to see him :)

I am thoroughly enjoying all this positiveness and it works a lot especially since my Junior Year is going quite fabulous, thank you Lord!

Off to catch up on my reading for the Bible, God's words are super-duper-awesomeness!

A Dream.

Lately I have been struggling with trying to figure out what I do with my senior dance project and I have some great ideas, I am just not so sure if I am keen on them or not. I want to be able to do a project where I will be really enjoying myself from the start to the finish.

Last night I had a dream that I had a glimpse of my senior project and it was weird, like most dreams usually are. But I was actually kind of intrigued by it, there were a lot of people in my piece and I can' remember who, I just remember they were from Cedar Crest and possibly somewhere else as well.

I remember that there was this one acting scene, really short and all these people that were in it had to pair up in two's and read the lines over and over again. Each time they would read it they would have to change it up a little bit and do something different every time. I remember being partnered with a woman who had blonde kinky curly hair and I am pretty sure she goes to Cedar Crest, but like I said it was pretty fuzzy.

We did this scene over and over again, it was on this huge stage and it was like a double stage with just a think piece of wood in between. But I remember looking out into the audience and seeing all of the performing arts directors from Cedar Crest. I remember them commenting how it was good and that it still needed more work, but that I was going somewhere with it. I also remember the lighting being really dark and grim.

Anyways, that was my dream or what I remember of it. I am hoping that the Lord will help my creative mind in so many ways in that way that I am able to come up with a good Senior Project and that I will keep having hope  in him in so many ways, because I love performing for Him :)

"For we through the Spirit wait for the hope of righteousness by faith." - Galatians 5:5

Inspiration...

Day 1 - Trust

I trust Luke.
I trust myself.
I trust the Lord.

Luke and I are trying this thing where we don't talk on the phone, text, or post on each other's walls on FB, because we want to slow down our feelings towards each other and focus more on God. So every time we think of each other, we have to think of God in place of thinking of each other :)

I would definitely have to say that we established this Monday night (1/31/2011) and so yesterday since there was no college :) I spent time thinking about him, but instead of I thought of the Lord and started catching up on some of my bible reading, it was pretty fab!

Since we didn't have college yesterday, I still held my bible study group and our topic was "Trust" and so our whole focus was on that passage [Interruption mode - "Come on Get Higher" by Matt Nathanson just came on pandora and it is making me think of Luke and I am laughing because I know why God is doing this, yeah I love the Lord because he makes me smile :)] Anyways, so the focus was on Trust and the infamous passage "Trust in the Lord with all thy heart and lean not unto thine own understanding" -Proverbs 3:5

I realize that with the simpleness of not talking to Luke for a week will be a challenge, but also allow me to focus more on the Lord and trust that He knows exactly what He is doing with Luke and I :) It is a nice feeling, because I like focusing more on God sometimes when I haven't been recently and I must say that I have missed going on a date with my man the Lord :)

I trust You with all my heart Heavenly Father,

lead me,

guide me

direct me,

I am Yours,

Forever&Always

<3



Salerno, Italy

On January 28th, I received a call from one of the project director's for Campus Crusade for Christ who told me that they wanted to speak to me!

I called Luke last that night and was freaking out, because I was so nervous as to what they were going to tell me. Then I told him I couldn't call back on the 29th of January because I have this weird thing with 9's. Luke told me to suck it up and get over my thing with 9's and call them back to find out if I got accepted or not. Yes, I listened to him because he was right and I was just being ridiculous.

I called back on Saturday January 29th and so many things were racing through my mind such as "what if we aren't on the same time zone" "what if it is too late and they gave it to someone else?" ....yeah I was freaking out just a little. So, I took a deep breath and called back...no answer, so I naturally started freaking out again with a zillion things racing through my head. I then took a deep breath and said a simple prayer and a few minutes later I get a call...they called to tell me that I was accepted into going to Salerno, Italy!

When I heard that I was going to go to Italy, I cried and cried and just couldn't stoop crying because the Lord blessed me with a dream that I have wanted to do for a long time! I have wanted to get out the country, but I have wanted to go to Italy for a long time as well. I know what makes it even more awesome is that I get to help plant seeds and reach out to others and let them know how awesome the Lord really is!

The Lord has a lot in store for me, he answered a dream of mine, but in return I am reaching out to others and so the Lord and get to go on an adventure together :) I am pretty excited to spend some time with my man the Lord :)

As a start I kind of need a passport first, which I have scheduled to get one on February 17th at 1:00 pm. I need my ds-11 form, birth certificate, 2 personal checks, a passport photo from either Walgreens or Walmart and then the appointment! I am just praying everything will still go as planned and I will be keeping everyone posted as to what I am doing for this in order to fundraise :)

I am excited to get my packet and excited for the start of my adventure!...Thank You Lord :)

"Therefore my heart is glad, and my glory rejoiceth: my flesh also shall rest in hope" -Psalm 16:9

For My Man.

So, this was on Facebook and I felt a little weird putting on FB without his permission.

Not only that, but our relationship revolves around the Lord and not us, so this is the "us" portion, which does happens sometimes :)

"BOYFRIEND WEEK- If you have a boyfriend who is your best friend, who works hard for you, who has been with you through thick & thin, who loves you even when you're at your worst, & to whom you are PROUD to be in a relationship with, copy & paste this with the date you both made it OFFICIAL: July 24, 2008 --- and I thank God each and every day for you :) "

...You're my Best Friend....

Texts From Him...

:I know the feeling. I love when I make you laugh. Especially when you laugh uncontrolably:

:Prepare to be rocked! And take notes:

:I'm glad you are doing better. I'm sad when ur sad:

: I don't know the there is something about you when you sound like you need me:

: He (God) needs me first and then it's your turn ;) :

: I love you! If I could shout it from the rooftop I would!:

:Only as long as you are first mate:

:That is one of the simple things i love. And it kinda makes me feel manly:

:Well you are the best thing that has happened to me(besides Jesus)so I gotta take care of you. I can't have you leaving. That would not work. Besides I love taking care of you:

:I would like to adopt a little colored child. =) they are realy cute:

:Sorry mark 14:51-52:

:I love you =):

:I am sooo in love with you Hannah Elizabeth!!:

:Hmm I love your hair its beautiful!:

:It's freezing here so a cuddle...hmmm:

:Ok sooo I'm playing pool in this guys house and he has terquoise swede walls!:

:It's soft on your face. And I won:

:They say "dang bro you did good" =):

:Yes they did =) I like these times where I get to show you off:

:I'm stoked and a bit scaired for life. But I am excited for my next steps no matter what I do and don't know:

:Well based on past experience, I might be a natural.I don't know its just a theory:

:You are an amazing woman! I thanked God for you today =):

:That's awesome I have rededicated myself to do better with personal bible reading and prayer time. Its hard to do it on a personal level because of so much that is already being stuffed into us. But its all good:

:If I learn some, thats actualy the class I'm taking. I'm doing good I love the class so far, my responsibiltys are minamal at this point so I'm loving Jesus. I cant wait to read and spend time with him and you:

:I've been falling in love with Jesus again this week =) its so nice:

:But...I am learning to be thankful for how God is growing in us:

:Yeah like somebody says to a guy "she's got you wipped." Like that but in a good way:

:No I'm crazy in love with you!:

:Just so you know, I have a dang good lookin beard:

:I thought you went to bed. And it does keep getting better. And i am falling more in love with you than I ever thought I could. It's def Jesus. You're my best friend:

:"A command from God is never with out the power to fulfill it" -Pastor Jacob Aranza:

:No thank God you are the best. You trust me and that means alot:

:Its because I know you love me. And so I trust you:

:Lord please calm Hannah. I pray that you give her peace that can only come from you. I pray that you will cause her to focus and think clearly. I also pray that you will work with the weather so that she will be able to get to allentown. Amen:

:Yeah I know. I am amazing =):

:Nice! That is so exciting! But yeah I know God's reasoning and its pretty sick how he does things. Yeah its awesome. Its ok I will see you in june or july:

:We can talk about it. Love you =):

:I would like to talk about it. We can pray about it and see what happens. My only thought would be that I would be a distraction:

:Hey Beautiful. You make me smile =):

:Ephesians 2:1-10 passage for the day =):

:Hey Beautiful, I love you =):

:Thank you sweetie! I've been just chillinin me bed for about a half an hour and honestly thinking about you =) I love you [sent at 11:11]:

:Na thats cool I told one or two besides wray. And my mom knows its in July. I was riding with some of my guys and we were talking about ladies that were got without makeup and i was like you mean like baby girl? (thatsyou =) I dont care if you say that, I'll tell you that you're fine:

:I told her maybe the 24th but that was before we realized it was wednesday. I kinda like it to, one of the other guys calls his girl that and I like it. What are you so excited about?:

:I am speechless when I try and say how excited I am! Yeah I kinda like nicknames. I didn't when I heard my parents but I love them now. I guess I had a perspective change. And i like the idea about asking mom. Although I think she will love it. Notice how I just said mom ;):

:Matthew Mark and Luke. They are called the synoptic gospels:

:Except for the decorate part I am =) I can't wait to take you for a motorcycle ride =):